Days of Dust.

Jealousy and paranoia had done their miserable work. She sat there alone, the darkness surrounding her like a cold heavy blanket, placed awkwardly on her shoulders by a random stranger. It did warm her bones but she didn’t feel comfortable in it.

She gazed into the invisible lines of space in the Stygian sky, trying to figure out what was to come after. The stars above, sparkling like angel fire, had a baneful effect upon her. In the dark, she had no name. The words you uttered ripped its way through her mind, till all that was left was a raw, bloody reminder of what she had done. Her mind was clouded with doubt, hurt and despair. With a heart as heavy as the pain that was weighing her down, she lifted her head and let out a low guttural moan that grew in volume and passion till it became a piercing scream. Her face grew tight with the effort and she choked as the tears spilled over without any warning. She bowed her head like a statue in prayer and murmured words of apology.

With her hopes on fire, she let her heart grow cold and shrivel up into a tiny pebble. The ache in her chest was a constant reminder of what could have been. How easy it was for you to leave. How easy it was for you to lie. She gazed out into the night, the hill overlooking the city lights, like little pieces of glitter. She stared till her eyes watered and the lights blurred into glowing medallions pinned onto a sheet of dark fabric. She had wrestled with her youth. Now, in her current state, all that was left was a silent philosophic acquiescence of her thirst to be permitted to exist. She released her breath from between her cool lips in a puff of surrender as her eyes slid shut. Tomorrow is another day to make the same mistakes again.

Ivana x

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